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After reading and responding to a few posts I really think this needs to be pointed out. We are in new territory here, and most of us were married for quite some time. Dating is new, it makes us anxious, and it makes us question what we bring to the table. BUT it can be very rewarding, fun, and life-changing... trust me! Let me point out a few things that might help someone;
Love does not fit into a self-formulated bubble. You can make a list of what you are looking for, and focus on that path---but if you have blinders on you might miss out!!! You may pass up the opportunity of a lifetime. (I have a 'list' and my first 3 dates fit that list almost perfectly--and I was bored by all three of them. Before accepting further date requests I went into a dating site to change my list... at the same time my now husband went in to delete his profile because all the women he had been meeting were WAY out there....it was on that day that our lives changed)
Meeting online can be a challenge, but so can meeting in a live social setting! Choose your challenge. Texting, phone calls video chats can really deepen a new relationship---and you are not distracted by being 'up close and personal'. Let your guard down, talk about the deep stuff, learn about each other, be silly, be sweet, and be intentional (we spent 51 hours in video chat over the first 10 days along with text and phone---and I work full-time LOL, apparently I did not need as much sleep as I thought.)
When it is time for that first meeting don't forget you are meeting with someone who has also aged--we are not 17 anymore--thank goodness! Own who you are, ALL of you, with weight, the wrinkles, the grey hair. Get yourself a haircut, shave what may need to be cleaned up, wear your favorite undergarments (get new ones, women get matching ones --- for you --- trust me you will like it) wear your favorite WELL-fitting outfit and OWN IT. Walk into that date knowing that you have a lot to offer, that you are worth being treated with kindness and respect, AND that you a worth being loved! Be playful and flirty when it feels right. Remember that the other person has issues too, some visible, some not. (New husband has medically induced !performance issues, and yet our intimate life is better than either of us have ever had, because we are authentic and open with each other, and our sex life is phenomenal)
Be safe, be aware of your surroundings, but get out there!
I agree with Tony’s article. I have been on many dates and on dating sites looking for a relationship. A week ago Saturday I started texting with a gentleman and we decided to meet on Tuesday. We have been seeing each other except for one night so far. I have met his son and daughter-in-law and his adult granddaughter. We have a lot in common and are truly enjoying each other’s company. You never know when that someone might come along. We both realize our relationship is very new and we need to learn more about each other and he has many of the qualities I want in a partner. I will keep you posted!!