Alone in a Crowd by professional author Andy Willoughby

After 3 years of being a widower I started realizing I had lost another position. I was no longer someone’s most important person. That is not an easy title to live without. I began to feel insignificant. I would watch movies or see friends or family with what appears to be crazy in love relationships and I envy. I am happy for them but I miss it for myself. Sometimes I crave it. I would often cry on the way home. I would try not to show it but I am feeling it inside to others, but it is there...

As I realized how much I missed that “one & only” relationship thoughts of regret would reappear. I asked myself why wasn’t I a better husband? Why didn’t I show her more appreciation? Stuff I can’t change. I just resign myself to do better if the Lord ever blesses me with another such relationship.

A successful marriage requires you to take another person into consideration in your daily activities. Will you be home for dinner? If you do something will your spouse be left alone? Do you go ahead and eat without them? All of these and just knowing you have someone to come home to or is coming home to you gives you more purpose than you think. After my wife died I found myself missing that purpose. It is a loneliness that you can feel even in a crowd when you see others in their relationships it makes you realize you don’t have yours. When I go somewhere I can normally keep myself distracted with what I am doing and who I am with. However, when I start thinking about going home I realize that I have no one to go home to. I often feel a deep sadness, in the early day a panic because it is something I just didn’t want to face.

To purchase Andy's book, The Reluctant Bachelor, visit: andywilloughby.com or search on Amazon.