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The Dance; What do You do? by Willard Raiford

Thirty five years ago I was living in Arizona and became involved with a group that sponsored dances for single adults. We had 4 churches that each allowed us to use their building once a month for a dance. I was at one of the buildings making sure the DJ had what he needed, the chairs were set up around the wall before the dance started. Just getting everything ready.

I noticed a new guy walk in the door. It was easy to spot a new guy, they usually wore a suit to their first dance. I could tell he was nervous and wondering if he was at the right place so I went over to him and introduced myself. During our conversation I learned his name was Jim, he was a cowboy and lived on a ranch in the desert about 50 miles away. Jim had 6 little kids and his wife had left him with all their kids. His mother had told Jim to come to town go to our dance and find a new mother for his children. He was there to find a new mother for his children that night. I told Jim I hoped to see him at our dances and he said nope this would be his one and only dance. He was a man on a mission.

After the dance was over I was talking to one of the women and asked her if she had meet Jim. She said yes she had. I told her about my conversation with Jim and she then told me Patty had agreed to marry Jim provided his mother and children also agreed. Never saw either one of them at a dance again.

There are people who will make life long commitments and not know each other. Sometimes it works and usually it does not.

As I read the different forums I sometimes think about cowboy Jim, ready to make a life long commitment with somebody.

The purpose of the dances was so men and women could meet and get to know each other. We had a lot of marriages happen because of those dances.

The hardest part for anyone was to go to their first dance, realize mister perfect or prom queen were not there, just normal people and come back again and enjoy the fellowship. Those that made the effort seemed to have a good time and make friends. I made some life long friends.

Thirty five years later we live in the world of internet swiping for dates or mates. I think it is too easy. When there is no effort there is no reward.

What do you do to put yourself out in the world to meet people?

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