Lazy Dating by Willard Raiford

I keep reading over and over men only want sex. Sex on the first date, sex before a first date , etc. I do not know who the women are meeting or where they find men like this. I suspect men who treat women like sex objects are not the best quality out there. To be honest there are women just as bad.

It is really hard to live alone after having been married for 20, 30 or 40 plus years. Being single is not a natural state for any of us. We all want to be that special person to someone again. To be held, caressed, kissed and sleep all night next to. That is how life is supposed to be.

But here we are. Alone with no one to share our joys and sorrows with. No one to say I love you to or be told they love us. Just alone and missing our spouses. Add in the loneliness and we have a recipe ripe to be taken advantage of.

I did not want to be single ever again in my life. I do not want to look for another companion. I know I have to be open to finding someone else or spend the rest of my life alone.

I crave affection. Someone to hold me, touch me, kiss me, tell me I am loved and everything is going to be alright. I realize I am prime to be taken advantage of. I know the feelings of love will surface for almost anyone I date. Getting my heart broken is a real possibility and most likely will happen several times before I find someone to share my life with.

This internet dating where I am suppose to look at someone’s facial features and know she is the one from me is hogwash. I might like your face but hate your personality. It takes time being around someone to get to know them and if you would want to spend your life with them. That is the purpose of dating, getting to know someone. You should not date anyone and everyone, only date someone you might want for a companion. There is another crazy dating ritual which makes finding someone special even harder. It is this notion you should only talk to or date one person at a time. Your going to get your heart broken multiple times. Early commitment is lazy dating. You just want them to be the right one. Why invest your time and your heart in someone you most likely will not spend your life with? You should wait until you find the right person to be serious with. That is when you should start the commitment process not before you know them.

Kissing, being close, etc is a natural part of dating and falling in love and being in love. That is what bonds two people together. We miss it. The desire to copulate is strong in humans. It is also part of the bonding between men and women. You can choose to lazy date or not date. You can chose to by pass the ritual of dating and falling in love and go straight to copulation. It is your choice what you do. Everyone knows the right way to fall in love. We just want love right now. We don’t want to be alone. Being alone is hard.

If the people you are meeting are not the quality you desire, maybe you should up your game. You might have to talk , text, chat with a few more people to find someone of quality but in the end it is worth the extra effort.

If you are talking or dating someone who disrespects you, why are you? When someone calls my phone I do not have to speak with them. When someone sends me a PM, I do not have to respond. It is my choice. It is your choice. Life is about choices. Sometimes we make good choices and sometimes we make bad ones. But we make choices.

I know some people find their new love on the internet. I’m not knocking internet dating but are you using it as a crutch for easy dating, easy meeting someone? Going for whoever responds.

There are worse things than being alone. Being with the wrong person can be worse than being alone.

Make good choices and enjoy your life.