About Widow / Widower Dating by Tony Mayer
I believe that being a part of a widowed community like this one, causes a very special bond. We are family. The fact that no one else understands us brings us together in a way that transcends distance, sex, and age as we congregate here in our little world that none of us ever wanted to be a part of.
As we show compassion in helping each other we actually help ourselves. The love and kindness that we show others will always find its way back to us.
There are basically two types of actions people can take in this world; we are both givers and takers. There are many ways to do both. There are also appropriate times for us all to do both and we actually benefit from both giving and receiving.
As we give each other love, support, and understanding, we not only help each other, but we also help heal ourselves. We never "get over" losing our loved one, but time does ease the pain.
Whatever you do, do it with love, kindness, and compassion, and expect nothing in return. If you do this, you will never be disappointed, and all that you give will always find it's way back to you...
Don't wait to be happy; be content and grateful for what you have now as you continue to pursue your dreams and above all else NEVER lose hope. Sometimes hope is all we have, but it is most often all we need along with a little patience.
There is no timetable for grief. No rule-book, or right or wrong way. Grief comes in waves and will always be a part of the new person who we have been forced to become. Just know that everything you are experiencing, as terrible as it is, it is completely normal.
Just know that you are not alone. Every single member here "gets it". And as we search for our "chapter 2", be patient and never settle. Somewhere out there the man or woman of your dreams is searching for you. Don't make yourself unavailable by being with the wrong person. You may have to "kiss a few frogs" before you find your Prince or Princess, but it will be so worth it.
As we all travel this unwanted journey together into the unknown always know that your beloved late spouse/partner would never want you to remain lonely or miserable. As hard as it is, rather than continue to mourn, try your best to celebrate their life by honoring them in remembering all of the wonderful times you had together. Celebrate their life and do your best to be happy. Not just for yourself, but for them.
We may never be the same person we once were, but we will survive and learn to be happy again. In time...
I hope that you all find the next love of your life here on Widow / Widower Dating, but more importantly, I hope that you find them anywhere! You deserve to be happy again!!!
May God bless you all with clarity and peace of mind. I love each and every one of you! I am certainly not a writer, but I felt it was time to at least give it a shot to get this blog started. I will look for WWD members who want to volunteer to write, so this will likely be my first, last, and only blog entry.
Members can send me original writings, poetry, or whatever they think would make a nice blog entry. The writings should idealistically be about dating as a widow(er), or at least dating, but all submissions will be considered. We will try to blog at least once a month and the writer will get full credit for the blog entry. Anyone interested, send your writings to tonymayer07@gmail.com with "Blog" in the subject line. God bless you all!